I have been reading a lot about sex and marriage lately due to my current situation. Most articles seem to be from the perspective of the wife denying her husband, but I can tell you it goes both ways. I promise you, the hurt and pain are very real. I can tell you from my perspective what your man must feel like if you constantly refuse. It feels like a slap in the face night after night after night. He will feel ugly and undesirable. He will not want to do anything for you at all.He may even be tempted to get it somewhere else, and no I’m not blaming the woman if that happens. A man is responsible for his own actions. Two wrongs don’t make a right. I’m simply stating the possible results that are even in the Bible.
3 The husband should fulfill his marital duty to his wife, and likewise the wife to her husband.4 The wife does not have authority over her own body but yields it to her husband. In the same way, the husband does not have authority over his own body but yields it to his wife.5 Do not deprive each other except perhaps by mutual consent and for a time, so that you may devote yourselves to prayer. Then come together again so that Satan will not tempt you because of your lack of self-control. 1:Cor 7:3-5
My prayer is that young women would understand the needs of their husbands in that area. I’m not talking the Duggar extreme of being “joyfully available”. Where you can NEVER say no. Just be understanding and respect his desires.
I know many women scoff at the thought of pleasing their man. The feminist movement has made women feel they don’t have to think of anyone but themselves. They feel that being home raising children is not worthwhile. Yes, I know, I work outside the home, but my schedule is conducive to being home when my children are out of school or my job allows them to be with me.
Just my two cents…and to all the wives and moms out there… YOU ROCK!
I’m so exhausted after 2 weeks of travel. We spent a few days in Hilton Head, SC at the hubby’s uncle’s time share. Then, it was off to Atlanta for a little fun and business, and finally off to Mickey Mouse at Disney World.
More travel to come as we visit family in order not to wear out our welcome in one place to long while we are homeless until the end of July.
The good thing is there is a lot of distraction. We are staying with our Pastor/Boss lady for right now. She also has a summer “Cadet” from the school we are about to attend staying with us. It’s one big boarding house. Lots of fun to keep me occupied.
Well, I have been dreading Valentine’s Day knowing what is NOT going to happen. Today I came across something on Radaronline about Michelle Duggar (eeeew I can’t stand her). She commented how wives should always be available for sex even if they are tired. I am so sick of the stereotype that men want it, and women don’t.
Well, you know what? There are men out there who have to beg their wives.
My man has a willing wife who desires to please him. And this is a problem???? By the way, he has NEVER complained and always seemed to enjoy himself.
Pardon me for going on about the same old, same old. Just reminding myself it’s HIS loss. I’m the normal one. LOL
I was looking at some old pictures today. There were some of when we first picked up our children to bring them home. What a wonderful day! They have grown so much. My daughter is now taller than me. I was thinking how she is almost 12 and we will only have her for 6 more years, and I got kind of sad because I realized by the time she leaves home, we will have only had her 14 years. Why couldn’t I have 18 years with my children like most people?
I was already feeling down. So what did I do this evening? I surfed the net reading about my marriage troubles. Feeding already negative thoughts is a real good idea, huh?
So then I feel cheated all over again. Back in the day, I tried to be good. I was a girl who was going to wait till her wedding night. I had an opportunity with a boy when I was 18, but didn’t do it. I even made my husband wait a year and a half until until we were engaged. Anyway, after adding up all the good years, I came up with 16. 16! That’s it! Gee, if I had known that was all it would be, maybe I would have taken that first opportunity.
Me: Why did you make me like you did? Why was I such a late bloomer? All the boys I liked just wanted to be friends. I never even had a real date until after high school (went to the prom with “just a friend”). No self respecting high school boy was going to ask me out when I looked like I was 12 even though I was 16.
God: I created your inmost being. I knit you together in your mother’s womb. (Psalm 139:13).
Me: Why did you not want me to have children of my own?
God: I think you see the answer to that now. I had 2 precious children who needed you.
Me: Yes, I see that clearly now. What about the the heartbreak of the two adoptions that failed?
God: What about them? I never promised you would not have pain. My ways are not your ways.
Me: But I didn’t feel you near me. I felt like you weren’t there, like you didn’t care.
God: Remember the poem about the footprints? When there was only one set of footprints, it was then that I carried you.