Archive | January 2016

Trust in God, and Trust that He Gave You a Brain

I have always wondered about people who say they trust God, so they don’t feel they have any responsibility for themselves.  They seem to think they can just sit on their rear end and God will do everything for them.  The saying “God helps those who help themselves” is not in the Bible, but I believe God has given us all a brain and expects us to use wisdom.

I like to say, “I trust God, and I trust that He gave me a brain.”  I have a friend that says,
“I trust God, and I still look both ways before I cross the street”.

There are those who refuse to go to a doctor because they think everything can be healed by prayer. Uummm, NO.  God gave us doctors to help us, but yes, still pray.  It’s like the story of the man who was stranded on his roof during a flood.  Three boats came by offering to pick up the man.  He refused each of them saying that God would save him.  Well, he drowned. When he gets to the pearly gates, St. Peter asks why he is there so soon.  The man says he doesn’t know. He thought God would save him.  St. Peter says, “Well, he sent you three boats!”

Then you have the people who say they trust God with the number of children they have and don’t use birth control.  I get that some people don’t want to use certain forms that don’t actually prevent conception, but there are other ways.  Seriously, if a man loses his job and the wife is already at home with two or three kids, is that really a good time to have another baby?   Don’t get me wrong, if there ends up being a baby after prevention, then sure, it must be God’s plan.

Let’s just use the wisdom the good Lord gave us and not use trust in God as an excuse to not be responsible for ourselves.


Who’s On First?

I was reading different comments on a few articles on whether women should put their husbands or their children first.  Boy, were there strong, heated feelings on both sides.  The thing for me is, why does it have to be one or the other?  First of all, I don’t like the idea of saying one is first over the other.  Both relationships are totally different. To me, God is first, and He wants me to care for my whole family as needed.  Spouses and children are not in competition.

Certainly, your marriage is important.  Your spouse will be the one with you long after your children have grown up and moved out. It is good for children to see a strong marriage.   That being said, a mother would not ignore her sick toddler throwing up in the bathroom because her husband wanted to get “frisky”.  However, if the children have been bathed, fed, and are doing OK (which is the case most of the time), there is nothing wrong with putting them to bed early and forgetting the dirty dishes to focus on your spouse.

I’m a firm believer in no children in the bed with the parents, not because of the adult activities that take place, but because that should be the parents time with each other even if it is just talking and cuddling.  Date nights are also important.

There are times when a mother may need to focus a little more on her child. A teenager might need some time to talk about a problem.  Your husband will not die if you take an hour to spend with your child.

Sometimes your husband might need you more.  Years ago, my husband had knee surgery.  He needed my help to get in and out of the shower so he didn’t fall, so I resorted to plopping the kids down in front of the TV.  I do try to avoid that, but sometimes you gotta do what you gotta do : )

Different circumstances call for different priorities.  God will give us the grace and strength to care for those we love as needed.


Hear me Roar


Sometimes I still feel down about myself, but as the new year starts, I am not going to give into negativity.  I have accomplished some good things in my life.

In 1997, I drove all the way from North Dakota to North Carolina and found my first teaching job after graduation.  This was before the days of cell phones and GPS.  I had a AAA map and my husband’s gun.  Most likely I would have shot myself in the foot like Barney Fife, but he made me take it.  I didn’t get lost either : )

Then, I did a Proverbs 31 and bought a house by myself.  “She considers a field and buys it…”

According to the beginning of my life, the odds were against me.  I was born to a single teenage mom from a “not so well off” family.  I also married very young before completing college.  A lot of people who do that don’t end up graduating, but I did (even got a Master’s too).

I did much better than I expected on preparing sermons and even got A’s preaching them.  OK, so that’s not a major accomplishment. Lots of people can do that, but it was a huge confidence builder for me.  As I think of a year ago I believe the Lord knew I would need that to face what I went through then.  I would have never thought I would be able to face a college president and stand my ground.  Heck, I went through 12 years of school never going to the principal.

New confidence continues for a new year.  If there are some who don’t like it, they can kiss my ….



Childhood Revisited

My family and I spent New Year’s at my parents in SC.  We had a late Christmas and spent a lot of time time talking about childhood memories.

My mom and I both have some wonderful memories of my grandma (her mom). We lived with her until I was 5 when my parents got married. Then we moved in next door to her when I was 10.

We laughed about how we would get in trouble and the switches she kept on top of the kitchen cabinet (that were still there in 2005 when the house was torn down).  Of course my mom had to go get her own switch back in the day.  By the time I came along, there was already a full supply. LOL   My mother would run out in the woods to hide from a “switchin'” but my grandma would yell, “I’ll get you in bed tonight!”

We remembered walking next door to her house for fried chicken every Sunday after church and how she used to have Oreos on the table for me when she picked me up from school.  And there was the time she broke her hip and refused to go to the doc.  It took the preacher to talk her into going.

I saw the movie, War Room, and that brought back some of the sweetest memories.  She had a walk-in closet where she prayed just like the lady in the movie.

We also talked about my birthfather’s side of the family.  I found one of my cousins on facebook and “friended” her.  Nothing back yet.  I have found my birthfather’s address and phone#.  Still debating on what to do

Who knows what 2016 will bring?   Have a great one!